“Strive for continuous improvement, instead of perfection.”
– Kim Collins
That quote speaks volumes to my little perfectionist, indecisive, and self-conscious self. I trapped myself in a box for too long, making up excuses for myself, reasons why it makes sense that I have not improved, and how in the grand scheme of things it somehow isn’t my fault at all. Not anymore though, I am more prepared and motivated than ever to grow and to see my flaws for what they are but to nurture them into something beautiful, sort of like a caterpillar.
So, without further ado, here are the top five areas that I want to improve in:
Being a perfectionist I find it staggeringly easy to see the negative or incorrect in a situation. I need to inhabit what Issac Morehouse calls the rough draft mindset. The idea that it is better to get stuff done and then get criticism than wait too long and turn it in “perfect”. The mindset of not holding yourself back, and going all in, accepting every suggestion and critique, taking them to heart and growing from it all.
Decide then Thrive
Decisions are around every corner, each word we say, action we take, etc. I am not sure when, where, or why but for as long as I can remember I have struggled with making decisions. Often it is little mundane decisions that don’t matter in the end that I’ll spend the most time agonizing over, worrying if when all is said and done I made the correct choice or not.
Confidence is Key
I wish I could go back to the moments when I was younger where I was too scared to voice something and make myself do it, just go for it and voice my thoughts and opinions. I think that if I started pushing myself when I was younger I would be better at public speaking, and overall a more confident person. I am now ready and motivated to become that person that I have always admired.
Imposter Syndrome Who
For those that do not know the definition of imposter syndrome is “the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills”. Some may say that this is a 2019 spoiled millennial mentality, to which I’d respond with, you’re about 99% not wrong. I need to get over this hurdle that is purely mental so that I can live a more enjoyable and freer life.
Take the Risks
So often I can become paralyzed with fear about risks, the uncertainty and risk to reward ratio constantly going through my mind. At times I can find myself in a standstill with myself, not moving but also not going backward due to the calculations that happen in my head before any amount of risk or danger is approached. This has lead to some good decisions but also a lot of missed opportunities that I wish I could go back and attack head-on.
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with” – Jim Rohn
When thinking about the people in my life that I spend the most time with or have had the most influence on me, a few people instantly come to mind. First and foremost, my mom, and then some close friends and coworkers of course. A rather ragtag group of people if I do say so myself, but you gotta love them.
Starting off with my mom, I have been extremely blessed with an incredible mother, she is the closest thing to a superhero that I know of. In my mind, she is what superman wishes he could be. I do not know how much more needs to be said when speaking about this woman that has impacted my life on levels that I probably am not even aware of. I would not be the person I am today without her and her encouragement.
I used to take for granted how magnificent she is until I saw how strong she truly is. My mom recently graduated from an accelerated BSN program. This was a big risk. She was one of the oldest in the class, she has five kids, and she hadn’t gone to school full time since high school. She definitely had her doubts but she never let any lack of confidence or imposter syndrome stop her from reaching her goals and that is something I have been trying to learn from her.
When it comes to my coworkers, I don’t really know them very personally. I am only about three months into my job so I am still in the getting to know you phase. I feel like I have a decent judge of character, so pretty quick into starting I could tell who the people were that would have a positive impact on me.
So, in a way, I have molded my little bubble of coworkers to a pretty solid motivational group of people. I know that this has and will help me stay positive and uplifting when working long hours.
For friends this is a tad bit complicated, reason being, most of my good friends don’t live in the same state as me. So, hanging out with them in person can be close to impossible at times. This leaves me often with a mix of feelings. I dearly wish that I had the opportunity to spend more time with them. They all have impacted my life tremendously and I can’t imagine how much bigger the impact could’ve been if it were in person instead of online.
The friends that I do have are truly some of the most humble, and uplifting people I have ever met, there is a never-ending stream of support from all of them. They are the ones that have helped build my confidence and made me a more open and bold person. They are also the ones that will be upfront with me if I am taking too long to decide or stuck in a negative mindset. If it weren’t for them I would still be that little shy kid in the corner.
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